How to Write Wedding Vows
Writing your own wedding vows is a wonderful task. You sit down to gather all your lovely memories, the wonderful journey you have waged with your partner, the dreams you have seen together, and the promises you two will make with each other.
The activity is tremendous as well as overwhelming. It is the moment to tell your story and let your guests know things that make your relationship special and meaningful. You get to tell the person you love how you fell about spending your whole life with them.
What are Wedding Vows?
Wedding vows are a lifetime pledge you make with your partner about committing your heart and life. You can use traditional vows or write your own; it is your choice. This is an intimate moment where the couple expresses their love, commitment, and promise to one another. Filled with emotion, wedding vows accompany many tears from the guests as well.
By tradition, the groom says his vows first. However, it is not a hard-and-fast rule. The bride can go first too or both can say their vows in unison. What matters is the words spoken rather than who speaks first. But decided ahead on who will go first to avoid any untoward situation later.
How to Write Vows
Here are a few things to consider while writing the wedding vows:
Avoid making them too long:
You might want to go on for hours to express your love and care for your partner. However, be prudent and keep your vows short. Try to concise them in two minutes span. The wedding ceremony itself can take around half an hour and two minutes each for vows can maintain the pace of the service. You have the whole life ahead of you to share memories and make promises to each other.
How to Start
Start with a statement about the place this person holds in your life. You can also start with a short anecdote or your dreams or expectations from your life partner. Tell what led you to spend your life with this person or when you realized you were in love.
Be Mindful
Emily from FergusJames has shared these tips with us:
Jot down everything that comes across your mind, be it a memory or some habit you like about this person. That will make it easier to compile the thoughts and summarize them. You can pick a theme as well, based on these thoughts, and focus on some items more.
Include a personal story to bring life to your vows. It will keep your guests hooked to what you have to say.
Be Clear and Concise
Make your promises clear and vow to stick to them. Include specific ways of supporting and loving this person. Use humor to make them interesting. For instance, “I promise to never snatch the covers unless you are hogging them.” You can also make your wedding vows religious and incorporate the relevant bible verses.
Do not exclude the part about rough times, as they are bound to come sometimes. Assure your partner that be it the best of times or the worst, you will always be with them—the ‘in sickness and in health’ part.
Wind up your vows with a view of the future. Mention your goals and aspirations that you want to achieve with your significant other. State how much you cherish the fact that you will be sharing the rest of your life with this person.
End the vows with a promise to live happily with each other, come what may. This is going to be the ‘till death do us part’.
Tips to Write Wedding Vows
- Prepare early. Do not wait up till the night before your big day to write your vows. Start early so you have enough time to prepare and recall all the memories. The days nearing the wedding ill already be filled with the stress of dealing with caterers, photographers, and dress picking. It is better that you do this before all hell breaks loose.
- Make a list of everything you can remember. You can skim through this list and finalize the points you want to add in your vows later.
- Keep practicing. You would not want your vows to come off as some scripted message. Try to speak from the heart, which will be possible only when you have practiced before.
